I’m at a loss for words because I’m so angry with myself.
Today fucking sucked on all levels. The altitude got to me. I’m incredibly tired. I tried pushing as much as I could, which resulted in eating shit again.
I took a chunk out of my elbow and the fall knocked the wind out of me. I had to actually stay still and take a breather because it hurt so bad. Then I freaked myself out and lost all confidence of descending, relegating myself to fourth place real fucking fast.
I felt every gd bump in my elbow which made it that much harder to go fast. And I’m just so mad at myself for crashing again and letting so many riders pass me.
I gotta say this is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. No day is easy. It keeps getting harder and harder and I feel like I don’t belong here. It’s like I bit off more than I can chew.
On the other hand, I am so impressed (and intimidated) by the amount of skill I’ve seen of people racing. Just the women in my category are so fuggin’ strong, it’s mind blowing. Not to mention the other racers who finish hours ahead of me or descend like they’re going down a smooth road.
And the guys who have gotten me through this wild fuggin’ ride have been amazing. Just to be able to laugh with them when I’m feeling really dark makes such a difference.
But I’m glad tomorrow’s the last day. I’m bruised, bloodied, and fuggin’ battered.
Stats:
Distance: 24.2 miles
Elevation: 5,749’
Results: 4th
GC: 2nd